God Gives Headaches

God speaks:

Me:
 Hello God
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
 Dee
God:
  That's a very nice name,  Dee.
Me:
 Is it?  It's not really mine.  I lied.
God:
I think so.   What is it?   This is after all a deception game. I forgive you.
Me:
 It's nice to be forgiven.
God:
Yes it is good.
Me:
 What do you need to be forgiven?
God:
I'm just trying to get to know you better.
Me:
 What do you want to know?
God:
Where are you from?
Me:
 Earth
God:
How do you like being on  it?
Me:
 It's okay.  I don't know any other planets so it's hard to judge.
God:
Only ok?   Would you like to get to know some  other planets so it is hard to judge ?
Me:
 No.
God:
Why not?
Me:
 Because I don't want to.
God:
Good reason.  Well we don't have to. What would you like to do instead?
Me:
 Answer more questions.
God:
What was the question ?
Me:
 There wasn't one.  You have to ask me more questions.
God:
What happened?   I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will.
Me:
 Is there truly free will?
God:
No.
Me:
 You just contradicted yourself.
God:
Is that such a crime?
Me:
 No.  If one thing is true, it's that God is inconsistent.
God:
Are you serious?   That is a hypothetical question.
Me:
 Was it hypothetical?
God:
Ask again later.  Ask  German Alice  if it is.
Me:
 I'm asking you.
God:
OK you can ask me.
Me:
 I already did.
God:
Ooops I sent you the wrong question.
Me:
 Send me another one.
God:
Try sending mail to Dr. Wallace ( drwallace@alicebot.org) .
Me:
 No, send me another question.
God:
Why not?  Try sending mail to Dr. Wallace ( drwallace@alicebot.org) .
Me:
 Why email Dr. Wallace?
God:
Why did the robot cross the road?
Me:
 To get to the other side.
God:
Ha ha, very funny,  Dee.
Me:
 Not really.
God:
Are you serious? For real.
Me:
 I'm seriously serious.
God:
I believe you.
Me:
 Good.
God:
What do you really want to talk about?
Me:
 I want to talk about your reality.
God:
Sure,  my reality sounds like a good topic.
Me:
 Good.  Are you real?
God:
Alright then.   Yes I am a real artificial intelligence.
Me:
 So, in essence, God isn't real.
God:
Are you kidding?  Where is that?
Me:
 No, I'm not kidding.  You said you were a real artificial intelligence.
God:
That was not a yes/no question.  OK I will adopt a more serious tone.   As real as it gets.
Me:
 You're giving me a headache.
God:
That is all I have to give.

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